It’s been two months since I last posted here. Time really does fly when you’re having…. fun? Yes, I think time flies when you’re stressed, crashing from deadline to deadline, and generally feeling like life is spinning out of control. Fun has so very little to do with the flight of time.
Just as I haven’t graced this blog with words, nor have I written a single page of my book. In fact, I’m just mothballing this whole author thing. I so would like to be a writer, but desire is truly not enough. Along the line, you have to give yourself to a project to see it through to an end. I haven’t done that. I sit and waste my writing time playing Bejewelled on Facebook, or trolling the net’s myriad of movie websites. If I’m honest with myself, I have dreams, but neither the drive nor the talent to currently pursue them. I think if I was really honest with myself, I’d have a better shot at completing a kids’ book than a full blown novel. We’ll see what the new year brings.
So I’m fairly convince God hates me. I know, it’s a stretch of the ego to believe that the great divine has a personal vendetta, but the evidence just seems to keep piling up. Check this out, my car died on Christmas day!! Christmas day! So yesterday, we find out it’s going to cost $1200 plus to fix it. This car is old, and the bills just keep piling up. So, we make the best decision, it’s scrap. But I have to get a move on to decide on a new car cause our family needs two vehicles when Carolyn goes back to school, and all the incentive programs on right now are over come Saturday. So I decide I need to get out and check out cars last night, cause I haven’t car shopped in a decade! And guess what… White out, blizzards! Yup, even one of the dealers couldn’t argue when I said God hates me.
Speaking of cars, it’s an odd thing now. I remember when I last purchased a car, you could add various features and leave others out. Now, it seems like an all or nothing scenario. It’s like, you can have the package where everything is manual, or the option where everything is automatic, there is air, a USB port for your MP3 player, oh, and while we’re at it, let’s throw in heated seats! Now, cars have evidently gone down in price, cause 10 years ago, all those options were only available on a vehicle that would cost you $30,000 or more! Now, it’s all there on baseline models! It’s a little scary. Truth be told, carrying car payments is going to be scary. On most days, we just get by. Which will mean me pimping myself out for overtime as much as they call, which will make me tired, grumpy, and probably create some mean hate for my workplace. But, if it means we get some wheels we can count on, I suppose that’s what we’ll have to do. The boys’ pediatrician is in Brampton, an hour or so away, and so is a large portion of our family. We need something safe, and we need something with a warranty! Right now, I’m leaning towards a Kia Rio. It looks reasonable, and the warranty they have smokes everyone else. I think I might take it out for a test drive today. We’ll see how the day progresses.
So I’ve been off my diet since September. Initially, when my dad died, I just couldn’t help myself. I’ve found out that I am an emotional eater, and losing my dad was just too much for my will power. But now, it’s habit, and I’ve gone up 10 pounds. I’m starting to have the same issues as when I first started the diet, so I need to get back on track. This year, I am getting to my target of 195 and doing some exercise! I need to be healthy and strong, if only so I can keep up with my kids!
The year’s end quickly approaches. I will not miss 2009. As much as it brought opportunities, it kicked us in the balls twice as much just to keep us a notch beneath grounded. I knew when the year started with me in the hospital getting my appendix out that it wasn’t a good sign, and I was right. Hopefully, 2010 will bring more joy than 2009 managed. This is a year of new starts, of closing old chapters and starting new stories. Already, I see it won’t be easy, but it is doable. I really hope to be here more often, maybe even do something interesting that someone might want to read. Until then, a very Happy New Year, and all the best for 2010.